DISCOURAGMENTS (With the Church)

                            DISCOURAGEMENT (Especially within the Church)
 

“Now the just shall live by faith; but if any man draws back, My soul shall have no pleasure in him. But we are not of them who draw back unto perdition; but of them that believe to the saving of the soul.” Hebrews 10:38-39.

 

 Disappointments and discouragements are struggles for saints and sinners alike, and no less serious. As for believers, many have drawn back, become bitter, given up. Some of the most difficult are the stumbling blocks that occur within the church.

 I have written this blog as an attempt to help any who may have been hurt, especially in the service of the Lord, lest they draw back, or even turn away. May the Grace of God and the love of Jesus keep you in the palm of His mighty hands.
 INDEX:
 - WITHIN THE CHURCH LIFE
-  LET DOWNS AND DISAPPOINTMENTS
-  BETRAYAL
-  FAILED EXPECTATIONS
- THE ENEMY THAT BLINDSIDES US
- IGNORANCE AND CARELESSNESS
- IMBALANCE
- UNHEALTHY PURSUITS AND AMBITIONS (personal testimony)

- OFFENSIVE CHRISTIANS
- ELEVATING LEADERSHIP
- DANGEROUS LEADERSHIP  RECOGNITION
- STUMBLING BLOCKS AND STEPPING STONES
- CONCLUSION
 WITHIN THE CHURCH LIFE
THE CHURCH – DEFINITION from the Greek word EKKLESIA – called out = the believers and followers of Jesus (called out of the world and unto Him)

 The Church in the Biblical terms are all those who believe in the Lord Jesus Christ (and are in covenant with Him).

THE CHURCH - Man’s Organizations – most have begun with a move of God’s Holy Spirit, but over the years may have sunk into traditions and doctrines of men. Within each of these organizations are genuine believers, and that includes the leadership. I do not wish to be arrogant here, but having spent almost all of my life being involved in churches of some kind or another I am merely speaking from what I have observed and experienced, and I am speaking in the great fear of the Lord.

 I have also found that in the churches that uphold the Bible as the inerrant Word of God, one tends to find a higher percentage of genuine, born again believers, and the leadership are usually strong disciples and more capable at feeding the flock of God. I have also found ‘born again’ believers in the older, traditional, churches, even though they would never call themselves that, or even recognize themselves as such. But, in every church, as with any human gathering, there are always problems.

“We know that we have passed from death unto life, because we love the brethren. He that loves not his brother abides in death.” 1 John 3:14

“The discretion of a man defers his anger, and it is his glory to pass over a transgression (offense).” Proverbs 19:11

“These things I (Jesus) have spoken unto you, so that in Me you might have peace; in the world you shall have tribulation, but be of good

courage: I have overcome the world.” John16:33

 LET DOWNS AND DISAPPOINTMENTS

  In life, even in our pursuit of Christ, we must expect to face discouragements, let downs, frustrations, disappointments, along with all the other trials and tribulations that a believer should anticipate. What may be more difficult is attempting to reconcile the sources from which they can come. The apostle Paul, even while approaching the time of his death, before he appeared before Nero the second time wrote Timothy, “At my first answer no man stood with me, but all men forsook me: I pray God that it may not be laid to their charge. Notwithstanding the Lord stood with me, and strengthened me…” 2 Timothy 4:16-17  Here he is abandoned, after the multitude of things he has already endured, and now nearing the end of his ministry and life when he has to face the tyrant, Emperor Nero, he is left on his own. We often may think that at the end of our lives things should be good now, but that may be a little presumptuous . This world is not our home – our true home is yet to come.  Jesus said, “He that endures to the end shall be saved.” Matthew 24:13

BETRAYAL

  Joseph, who was betrayed and sold by his brothers is a tremendous example of persistent faith bearing up under severe betrayal and hurt. He continued serving the Lord with all his heart at whatever task he was given and did not allow bitterness and resentment to consume him, in spite of all the injustices he faced, and he ended the event with gracious forgiveness. What is more, because of his servant’s heart, he brought the blessing of God into every situation he was found in in spite of the pain which had doubtlessly haunted him.

 The Lord Jesus Christ Himself was betrayed by His own disciple “For it was not an enemy that reproached Me; then I could have borne it: neither was it he that hated Me that did magnify himself against Me; then I would have hid myself from him. But it was you, a man My equal, My guide, and My acquaintance (friend). We took sweet counsel together, and walked unto the house of God in company. Psalm 55:12-14  Although likely a personal experience of David’s, it is also a prophetic verse foretelling of Jesus’ betrayal by Judas. We can see, and certainly know, that Jesus really loved him. What is more, Jesus own people betrayed Him, and His disciples abandoned Him, and so did we all… But what was His loving and gracious response while they crucified Him…? “FATHER, FORGIVE THEM, FOR THEY KNOW NOT WHAT THEY DO.” Luke 23:34   He has called us to endure and respond in the same way when we are afflicted, and by His grace and Holy Spirit within us, we can.

 FAILED EXPECTATIONS

 Whether concerning people or things, our expectations, unless they are by a revelation from God, can end up in a deep disappointment leading to discouragement or worse. We can assume to know or believe something and then feel let down when it does not come to pass as we expected, or when we expected. This can be very dangerous. “Hope differed makes the heart sick.” Proverbs 13:12

  As with so many things, a hope or an expectation misplaced, whether by assumption, incorrect information, treachery, or deception, can lead us to a disastrous conclusion. All our hopes must be finally grounded in an unconditional trust in the Lord Jesus Christ regardless of what turns out, He is our Prize, He is our Shield and Exceeding Great Reward (Genesis 15:1). “…And these all, having obtained a good report through faith, received not the promise: God having provided some better thing for us, that they without us should not be made perfect.” Hebrews 11:39-40.  There are always reasons why things do not work out the way we anticipate, hope, or think/believe. The world and God’s Kingdom, are so much bigger than ourselves, so we do not know all the reasons why things turn out the way they do, but we must trust God’s Goodness, and that He is surely doing what is best. As a side note, Baruch, Jeremiah’s scribe was reproved by the Lord because he felt that he was getting a raw deal even though he had been faithfully serving the Lord all along: however, he was not taking into account the state of affairs that Judah was undergoing at the time. “…Thus says the Lord, ‘Behold, that which I have built will I break down, and that which I have planted I will pluck up, even this whole land. And you seek great things for yourself?’” Jeremiah 45:4-5

 THE ENEMY THAT BLINDSIDES US

 We must never forget that we are in a battle, and have an enemy who continually endeavors to thwart our best intentions, and blessings that can come our way. “Wherefore we would have come unto you, even I Paul, once and again, but Satan hindered us.” 1 Thessalonians 2:18  Perhaps far too often when things go wrong, fail, or what not, we turn around and blame those closest to us, including the Lord, or anyone that we figure is involved. True the devil uses people (including us), and no doubt they, and even we ourselves are oblivious to it. Oh how we need the understanding, wisdom, and discernment of God, to perceive when our adversary is up to something. He (the devil) loves it when we point fingers and we inflict hurt on each other, and he wins if we give in.

 Therefore, we are to endure hardship as a good soldier of our Lord Jesus Christ 2 Timothy 2:3, and, “In your patience, possess ye your souls.” Luke 21:19

IGNORANCE AND CARELESSNESS

 Our ignorance is a dangerous enemy. Poor judgment, wrong conclusions, improper evaluations, all which lead  us to hurt, bitterness, resentments, disillusionment. Look friends, we all struggle with these at times, and yet often blame the Lord, or precious friends, and even family, for letting us down. “A man’s own folly ruins his life, yet his heart rages against the Lord.” Proverbs 19:3  NIV.

The ignorance  and carelessness of others can cause much harm, as we have all experienced, and no doubt have done. In such cases we need to be gracious and patient even as the Lord is patient to us, and likely many others have been with us. “Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ  forgave you, so also do ye.” Colossians 3:13

IMBALANCE

 This is a common tendency for believers. Zeal, enthusiasm, dedication, if not harnessed carefully can produce various problems and even hurtful situations; neglect of other responsibilities, neglect of family, and health. Exhaustion…burnout follows closely behind along with other breakdowns. If we continually drive our vehicles without giving it the proper maintenance, what should we expect? Jesus said, “Come unto Me all you that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you, and learn of Me, for I am meek and lowly in heart, and you shall find rest unto your souls. For My yoke is easy, and My burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30 If we over extend ourselves we not only hurt ourselves, but also those dependent on us – our families, especially the children. Please be careful and make sure you are being directed of the Lord, and are allotting time for all your needs and responsibilities, including rest. Develop the ability to say, “No.” when necessary (except to the Lord). Often, when things go wrong, we blame others first.

UNHEALTHY PURSUITS and AMBITIONS

 Another lethal deception that can creep in ever so subtly and lead to disaster are pursuits that are out of balance. There may very well be nothing wrong with the object pursued, it may be in the Lord, like the ministry, doing charity work, or even a wholesome career.  The issue may be just in our heart, and we have no one else to blame. When I was a young man and had met the Lord, I felt totally satisfied and that all I was looking for in life I found in Him. John 6:35 became my reality since that time; however I felt that there was something that I should be doing with my life, but I had no idea what. Now I had gotten saved on my own outside the church, so to speak, by reading just a few chapters in the Bible. At the time I was not going to any church. I was raised Roman Catholic, and had since ceased to go to Mass. One day at a new job I noticed that there was something different about the janitors, and they played strange music (Christian rock in its early days). So I cornered one of them and asked if he was a Christian, which he obviously was. He told me that I should be serving the Lord. That was it! That was what I was looking for. I had always wanted to serve the Lord since I was a young boy. Anyways, to keep the story short I dropped everything and gave myself wholly to serving the Lord.

 Now the church they had invited me to was an independent Charismatic full Gospel fellowship. It was radically different from anything I experienced. People were getting saved, healed, and filled with the Holy Ghost. It was absolutely exciting. I couldn’t get enough. What is more, the Senior Pastor, a very godly man, was intending to train and 'ordain' leaders for the ministry. That was precisely what I was looking for. I dropped everything (except work), and jumped in with both feet. I went to every meeting, every class, every event, every outreach opportunity, and in my spare time did outreaches on my own. I could do all this because I was not married. This went on for over a decade. I was actually living at the church as the caretaker, and I was hoping to help the pastor so that he would be freed up to do all the outreach he had planned. What I couldn’t figure out was why things were dying and going backwards instead of forward (conflict had entered the fellowship). I was mad at him because I felt he was not fulfilling his God Given Vision to spread the Gospel throughout the Yukon Territory. We were located in Whitehorse. Then one day the pastor took me aside and told me that he was retiring, and he was passing the church on to the former assistant pastor. Not only was I shocked, because I felt that he would never retire, but I did not like that idea of this other pastor. Although he was an excellent pastor, I felt that he did not have the same vision to make this work a training base to send teams throughout the north. Then he went on to tell me that he did not want me to take over the work because he felt that I would hurt people (he was right there). Now I never thought of myself being pastor, let alone lead pastor, especially there, but he also suggested that I move on and leave. That devastated me. Here I had given the best years of my life,  my strength, all my money, all my time and energy with the hopes of getting ordained and being a part of an on fire for God ministry to reach the world for Jesus, and I was being sent away empty handed and humiliated. I had explained to my parents and family what I was doing, and now I am being turned away with nothing to show for all my work, dedication, and sacrifice. Instead I was being turned away like a fool (so to speak) with nothing but the clothes on my back. I had no interest in any other career or pursuit. I will not mention temptations that tried to overtake me at that point, but for the grace of God and because He had become my Life and Mainstay before I began this pursuit, I could have perished with my dream.

The Scripture says, “For you are dead, and your life is hid with CHRIST in GOD.” Colossians 3:3

  Without even realizing it, we can take up our lives in this world again if our hopes, desires, and affections are attached to anything in this world. And should it go down, we can go down with it. When the stock market crashed in the 1920’s, business men jumped out of high rise buildings because their lives were bound to their financial investments. So when their investments crashed, so did they - literally. The following verse says, “When Christ, Who is our LIFE, shall appear, we shall appear with Him in Glory.” Colossians 3:4

 Christ Jesus is to be our Life, and not even anything we do for Him. He is a Jealous God, and will take second place to NONE. “…and thou shalt have no other gods before Me.”  Because He is the true and Living God, anything we put in His place, by default we are making that a god.

 I did not realize I had drifted that far off course. I thought that everything I was doing was for the Lord, and to an extent it was. But I was also serving a personal ambition that I was not consciously aware of, and did not recognize it until it came crashing down. There were warning signs which I did not recognize, nor was likely able to because of my arrogance. Arrogance was one warning sign which is blind to itself since it has an overinflated value of self.  Along with that was an increasing anger and hostility toward those who were not doing what I thought they should be doing. Resentment and bitterness were also thriving. What blinded me the most was my self-justification. After all, I was using the Bible. I had some slight suspicions regarding the growing lack of the fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23) in some of my attitudes towards the brothers in Christ. Nonetheless, the Lord mercifully spared me, and many others from me - praise His Holy Name!

 I have written this with the hopes that if you have drawn back, and are struggling with bitterness and resentment because of past disappointments or let downs, and are holding God’s people, or even the Lord Himself responsible. Perhaps this may be of assistance to help you see from a different perspective. There are times when others are at fault, but do not neglect to consider any of our own guilt that we are liable for. Nor forget to be gracious, because more times than we realize, we have hurt people, most likely unintentionally, and have been oblivious to it. We may have even been used by the devil thinking we are serving God, and have caused real harm. Matthew 16:22-23, John 16:2.  As the Scriptures says, “He shall bring forth judgment unto truth/victory.” Isaiah 42:3, Matthew 12:20 When we see from His perspective, He liberates us and brings us to His place of healing, love, forgiveness, peace, joy, and forgetting those things that are behind so we can reach toward what is ahead.

OFFENSIVE CHRISTIANS AND CHURCHES

  There are definitely people and situations that have done untold damage through the Church. As Jesus said, "Offences will come...", and some by ignorant and well meaning people right from within the church, and some by just vicious and ignorant people who claim to be believers. The apostle Paul called them false brothers. I would not dare to be quick to call someone a false brother, because God alone knows the hearts. The behavior of a careless and ignorant person can be every bit as damaging and hurtful as that of a false brother, yet they may very well be a earnest believer in Jesus. Nonetheless, we must never allow the actions of people, saint or sinner, to shake our faith in Jesus, nor hinder our obedience to God our Heavenly Father. Jesus said that offences will come, and woe to the person through whom they come. That is why we need to pray for those who despitefully use and persecute us, and be ever so careful we do not do so to others. EXPECT IT, YOU WILL GET HURT. People are people, in the house of God and outside the house of God.  What makes it worst, is because we are suppose to be family, and more than that, we should know better."Above all, love one another deeply, because love covers a multitude of sins." 1 Peter 4:7 FORGIVE!!! This is non negotiable command from our ALMIGHTY GOD AND FATHER, "Forgive, just as God in Christ has forgiven you." Ephesians 4:32 Our failure to forgive can lead to our own destruction. Please, let us forgive! 

 Sometimes, especially if the offense is from a church group, we still forgive, but it may be best to cancel the debt, walk away, but follow Jesus from another standing point. Some situations may be unhealthy, and there even may be a violation of the Scriptures, as in a legalistic church fellowship, where there is abuse and an un-Christlike treatment of people who do not meet the standards of adherents. Yes, the best thing that may have happened to you is being excluded from their midst. But in all of this, stay close to Jesus, be on guard against bitterness and unforgiveness, and abide in the love of Christ. He loves you so much. Keep your heart tender and keep following Jesus.

ELEVATING LEADERSHIP

 We are to hold leaders in honor, even double honor “1 Timothy 5:17, submit ourselves to them in the Lord Hebrews 13:17, but we are to be disciples of Jesus only. 1 Corinthians 1:12-13, Matthew 23:8-10. Everything has its place, and so does everyone. When something is out of place or someone is out of order, that can cause serious problems. God places people in our lives to help disciple us in Jesus, and help us grow into a place of maturity where we can help others grow in Christ. The leaders God places in our lives are there for our benefit from the Lord, but we must be careful not to place them in our hearts and minds above where they should be. That can harm not only ourselves, but them as well. What is more, people will fail us, even if we are not elevating them out of place, but by being in a place of submission through a bad decision on their part, carelessness, and whatever else, we can be vulnerable to be hurt by them, and they may be completely unaware of it. At this point there are several things we can and should do:
1 – let them know Matthew 18:15-18 Actually this applies to whoever hurts us.

2 – Forgive them from your heart regardless if they acknowledge your hurt or not. This is a non-negotiable Matthew 6:12, 14-15  As Jesus said in verse 14, we must completely cancel their debt, even the way God does for us.

3 – Do not spread bitterness! Hebrew 12:15

4 – Keep faithful in serving Jesus the way Joseph did, and do not let bitterness and resentment, destroy your love, faith, joy, and service.

5 – Be careful not to let yourself be in a vulnerable position for another hurt. Notice how David would not allow Saul to be close to him, even after he (Saul) earnestly admitted that he was in the wrong for hunting and trying to kill him. This happened twice, and David could see that the thing that caused Saul to hunt him did not change, so he was careful not to leave himself and his men vulnerable to him.

 One other concern about elevating someone unwisely, is the possibility that they may fail you and your expectations, and without knowing it, you were actually following them and not the Lord, and then feel disillusioned about serving Jesus. They are not God, and we are to “Let us fix our eyes on JESUS, the Author and Perfecter of our faith…” Hebrews 12:2 NIV

DANGEROUS LEADERSHIP

 There are also times when a leader can be dangerous. If we find ourselves excited about a leader or some ministry more that Jesus, first check your own heart, and then here are some things to consider about the leader/leadership:

a. Flattering individuals and or the congregation

b. Promising greater liberty and more of the Lord than other churches and implying or stating outright that they are ‘the people’ and everyone else is deceived

c. Not allowing his people to listen to other ministries or acknowledge other churches

d. He is not subject to other authority

e. Exalting his own teachings above the Bible

f. The gospel is about performance and gain, and not grace

g. If there is a tolerated level of sensuality or lust

h. Belittling the people who are not fully co-operating, and using manipulative tactics like guilt, and saying they are failing God if they do not do such and such…

i. Drawing disciples after themselves

WARNING!!!

These are extreme cases, and this list is not meant for it to be held up   against leaders because of evil suspicions or bad attitudes you may have. Then you will surely find ‘grievous’ faults, (“Love thinks not evil.” 1 Corinthians 13:5), especially if you have been offended in some way. When we are not acting in love we become blind and do shameful, hurtful, and evil things, ourselves.

“And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ…” Philippians 1:9-10

RECOGNITION

We all want people to acknowledge and appreciate us, but that too must go to the cross, remember, “…you are dead, and your life is hid with Christ in God…” Colossians 3:3 2 “…but unto your Father which is in secret: and you Father, which sees in secret, shall reward you openly.” Matthew 6:18 There are times when a simple ‘Thank you’ or a note of appreciation given is nice, but in our hearts we turn and give all the glory to the Lord. After all, everything we do is for Him and through Him, and being able to serve and glorify Him is reward in itself. Really, in the end, everything we do is out of faith, love, and thankfulness, and the privilege and honor is ours. Thank You Lord Jesus!

 Dear friends, I want to acknowledge that the answers I have given will seem to be simply 'pat answers', especially if you have been severely hurt or wounded, and I fully understand. Please bear with me as I give a little advise from my own experience. Be steadfast! Be steadfast in your most private and personal time with the Lord. Take time to be with Him alone and do so constantly. Stay in the Word/Bible. Keep it fresh within your spirit, it is a defensive weapon. Run to Jesus for your healing "He heals the broken heart, and binds up their wounds." Psalm 147:3 And any of us who have walked with Him for any time can testify to this. Next, find a place of refreshing in Him, and helpful, God fearing, company. And if you can, and it is the Lord's will, remove yourself from the hurtful situation, at least until the Lord binds up the wound and changes the circumstance.

 - STUMBLING BLOCKS AND STEPPING STONES

All events in our life are a trial of faith, and they can either be stumbling blocks, or stepping stones, and an opportunity to glorify the Lord. The choice is ours, and how we respond to adversity will determine what they will be. Let us stay humble and close to Him.

 CONCLUSION
 Discouragements, disappointments, and let downs are a part of life and a test of our faith. Expect them, keep you eyes and heart fixed on Jesus, and walk in Love. He is waiting for you on the other side.