15 - Biblical Anger Management- Contributing Factors -1 Learned and Undisciplined Behavior

 

                                  GOING AFTER CONTRIBUTING FACTORS       

                             1A   -   THE LACK OF GREAT UNDERSTANDING!

 Again I want to emphasize that what I am putting forth in all these lessons are merely helps at best. There are not magic formulas. The only true help and deliverances came by the faith in the Work of the Lord Jesus Christ which He accomplished for us on the cross. As He said, without Him we can do nothing!

“He that is slow to wrath is of great understanding, but he that is hasty in spirit exalts folly.”

Proverbs 14:29

 For now we see through the glass darkly; but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then shall I know even as also I am known.” 1 Corinthians 13:12

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering/patience, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance/self-control: against such there is no law.” Galatians 5:22-23

“Jesus said unto them, “If you were blind, you should have no sin, but now you say, ‘We see’, your sin remains.” John 9:41

 It is imperative for us to realize that our assessments, perspectives, conclusions, and judgements, rarely have a fully comprehensive point of view, are rarely without bias, prejudice and assumptions, and according to these verses if our reactions end in anger and rage, we lack understanding, are not being led by God’s Holy Spirit, and are blind. We know that we are not walking in the truth – “And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.” John 8:32. “Who is a wise man and endued with knowledge among you? Let him show out of a good conversation his works with meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter envying and strife in your hearts, glory not, and lie not against the truth. This wisdom descends not form above, but is earthly, sensual, devilish. For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work.  But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, and easy to be entreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy. And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace.” James 3:13-18

“Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.” Romans 12:21 “And the servant of the Lord must not strive, but be gentle unto all men, apt to teach, patient, in meekness instructing those that oppose themselves; if God peradventure will give them repentance…” 2 Timothy 2: 24-26

                                   1- LEARNED AND UNDISCIPLINED BEHAVIOR

You may have learned and have been allowed to behave in an undisciplined manner and thus make excuses for you behavior, but now at the cross of Christ these excuses are unacceptable, and in Christ Jesus they must be repented of.

                       “Let every man be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath, for the wrath of man does not work the righteousness of God.” James 1:19-20

“But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips.” Colossians 3:8.

 "Do not make friends with a hot-tempered man, do not associate with one easily angered, or you may learn his ways and get yourself ensnared." Proverbs 22:24-25

 

God is fully aware that we can be taught things from our youth and up and unknowingly have learned wrongly or simply not have been properly trained and disciplined by our parents. However, now that we are adults we are to “put childish ways behind us” and “in the times of this ignorance God winked at, but now He commands all men everywhere to repent”. We may have had our excuses, but especially in Christ Jesus He not only expects us to change our ways, but taught us what and how we are to change. He has also provides us the knowledge and power to change by His Spirit and Word through His grace in Jesus Christ.

 

ACTION STEP #1- ASSUME RESPONSIBILITY FOR Y0UR ACTIONS AND

                                  BEHAVIORS AND CEASE TO JUSTIFY, BLAME AND ACCUSE!

                                As long as you are not responsible in your own eyes you will

                                always feel justified to remain unchanged and unable to.

                                Cancel the debts - that you feel others owe you, because of which you justify the 

                                 the reasons for your behavior. IT IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY NOW!

                                                            STOP-CONSIDER-DO SO NOW -

ACTION STEP #2- Ask God to forgive you for your behavior and help you

                                 Change. STOP-CONSIDER- DO SO NOW

                         #3- Change your thinking on what you may consider allowable

                                 anger. Repent and renounce the assumed right.

                                 STOP-CONSIDER-DO SO

                         #4- Take your pride to the cross of Christ. Pride likes to defend

                                itself and to strike out. It likes to be right, to punish and

                                to correct. STOP – CONSIDER-DO SO

                        #5-  Before the Lord, begin to control your anger in every

                                little instance. Do not give yourself the luxury of allowing

                                yourself to give into little displays of anger or harbor angry

                                feelings. Repent immediately and ask Him to help you.

                                Challenge your feelings and your thinking. “Love thinks no

                                evil.” STOP-CONSIDER –DECIDE. 

                        #6- Through Jesus, begin to subject your;  a.  thinking process and

                                your perspectives according to God’s Word and in the fruit 

                               of the Holy Spirit = truth. Ask for wisdom. James 1:5

                                             b. Your feelings. James 1:12-15

                        #7- Learn to become forgiving, to “Overcome evil with good”

                               (especially your evil), to be thankful to God, and to be loving

                               to people.

                        #8- Exercise Temperance in all areas of your life. Perhaps no one other

                               than the Lord Himself can ever fully succeed in this exercise, but the

                               Scriptures admonish us to, and Temperance or self- control is a fruit of

                               the Holy Spirit, Galatians 5:23. As we bring control in more areas of our

                               lives through God’s grace, we will notice that it is easier to maintain ourselves

                               in every area. The goal is to not let the flesh have control at any time.

                        #9- Break your agreement with those aspects or persons you admire who may

                                have displayed angry behavior - "Make no friendship with an angry man; and

                                with a furious man you shall not go, lest you learn his ways, and get a snare

                                to your soul." Proverbs 22:24-25 "Have no fellowship with the unfruitful works

                                darkness, but rather reprove the." Ephesians 5:11

“And every man that strives for the mastery is temperate in all things. Now they do it to obtain a corruptible crown, but we and incorruptible. I therefore so run, not as uncertainly; so fight I, not as one that beats the air; but I keep under my body, and bring it into subjection. Lest that by any means, when I have preached to others, I myself should be a castaway.” 1 Corinthians 9:25-27

“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind (self- control).” 2 Timothy 1:7.

        

                             STOP-CONSIDER- DECIDE- COMMIT TO GOD.

           NOTE- EXPECT THIS TO BE A LIFETIME EFFORT – We are all in this together!