3-Biblical Anger Management - You lose control

 

                                                      SECTION 2-

                                                            PART 1

              CONTROLLING YOUR ANGER- YOU LOSE CONTROL

           These must be dealt with now and not left till you are confronted with an opportunity to get angry. That is too late. If you do these and persist at them you will find  a major change in your angry reactions

ACTION STEP # 1- Take it to God and confess your fault, ask Him

                      to forgive you and help you. Surrender your anger to God.

NOTE – You must mean it with all your heart and recognize it as sin in your life. The scripture in no way condones the loss of control in anything, and God holds us accountable for our actions. Numbers 20:1-12, Psalm 106: 32-33. “I will be sorry for my sin.” Psalm 38:18.

Again, we must not deceive ourselves and assume that God will hear a half-hearted mechanical or unbelieving prayer. “Them you will call upon Me and you will find Me when you shall search for Me with all your heart. And I will be found of you,” declares the Lord, “ and I will bring you back from your captivity.” Jeremiah 29:12-14. “And they have not cried unto Me with their heart, when they howled upon their beds:” Hosea 7:14a.

 Therefore you must review your behaviour until you mean it wholeheartedly without any self-justifying. He understands everything perfectly, He loves you and wants the very best for you. So be strong and keep moving ahead.

 

PREPARATIONS PRIOR TO INCIDENT This work must be carried out in advance since

             you apparently are predisposed to lose control when you do get angry. Trying to reign in our

             emotions once they have been unleashed can neigh be impossible in comparison to having pre set

            controls and blocks for when the occasion arises.

 

            ACTION STEP              1. Determine; a. to hold your tongue at the next rise of anger.

            “For in many things we offend all. If any man offend not in word, the same is a perfect man,

             and able to bridle the whole body.” James3:2

                                                     b. You will humble yourself and chose the path of peace. “Only

            by pride comes contention,” Proverbs 13:10, He that is slow to wrath is of great understanding,

           but he that is hasty of spirit exalts folly.” Proverbs 14:29

DISARM YOURSELF    2. Repent of any assumed right you may have

                                            to use

                                           violence or bad and vicious language.

                                             James 3:1-6 DO SO NOW!!!

                                        3. Repent of allowing yourself to indulge in

                                           petty displays of anger like screaming and

                                          and yelling, cursing, pouting, throwing and

                                           hitting things,… DO SO NOW!!!

BREAK BAD                  4. Repent of harbouring grudges and offenses.

ALLIANCES                        DO SO NOW!!!

                          5. Repent of suspicions and thinking the

                                                     worst. “Love thinks no evil.” 1 Cor.13:5  

                                         6.  Repent of allowing yourself to nurture 

                                         petty distastes, agitations, resentments.

                                PONDER-EXPOSE-DO(continually)

                        7. Determine to avoid people, places, and things

                            that promote trouble. “Avoid every kind of

                            evil.” 1Thess. 5:22 PONDER AND DO.

NOTE !!! REPENTANCE TOWARD GOD AND FAITH IN THE

       LORD JESUS CHRIST. He is the One Who makes it work.

 

 LIFE RULE-OUR DUTY TO DO WHAT IS RIGHT AS JESUS WOULD, ALWAYS PRECEDES OUR RIGHTS EVEN IF UNJUSTLY TREATED.

 

When we disarm ourselves the tender is exposed and issues will likely surface. Be: prepared prayerfully, patiently, and in the fear of the Lord! Then examine carefully the issues that surface. You may find instances and situations come forth that you have completely forgotten or never considered as a problem. NOW YOU MUST FACE THEM. There may be people you have to forgive, attitudes, choices, vows, judgments, mindsets that you need to renounce and repent of. You will be surprised, and the change it makes in you may astound you.

 

 

                STOP - DETERMINE - CHOSE THE PLAN OF ACTION

 

ACTION STEP 2 – Exercise control in other areas of your life – especially in the area

                               Of holding your tongue- work at these daily 1 Corinthians 9:25-27

                                James 3:2

                                3 – Forgive and change your understanding, HATE has possibly set in!!!

                                      This could account for loss of control.

 

                  PART 2 - DEVELOPING NEW STRATEGY –

 

ACTION STEP #1- Trust in the Lord to: change you. 2 Cor. 5:17

                                                                  Help you. Isaiah 41:10

                                                                  Fight for you. Ps.37:1-9

           Allow the Holy Spirit’s temperance help you control your anger. Galatians 6:23

 

                           2- BREAK YOUR PRIDE:  Release yourself

                                from the assumed attitude that:

                            a. you have the right to straighten out

                                            people and things that appear to oppose you.

“Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to become angry.” James 1:19

                                      b. have to avenge, justify, defend yourself

                                        as you see fit. Romans 12:17-19

                                      c. you like to fight, instead learn to turn the other cheek. Matt.5:39.

                            3- Exercise the command to cancel debts/forgive.

                                    Matthew 6:12-15

                            4- Exercise yourself in the law of love.

                            “Loves does no harm to a neighbour,” Rom.13:10

                            5- Exercise yourself in the law of humility.

                                Refrain from exalting yourself and criticizing/judging in your thoughts.

                                Proverbs 30:32-33

            STOP! – CONSIDER-DESCIDE- COMMIT TO GOD-NOW!!!!!

                            6- Learn to constantly scrutinize your thoughts,

                                 attitudes, motives, actions, feelings, words,…,

                                 and ask the Lord to help us in this. Do ask

                                 yourself, “Why am I wanting, doing, feeling,

                                 thinking, behaving like,… saying that?

                           

Some of our struggles against sin in our lives may take some persistence until they are defeated. “And let us not be weary in well doing; for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.”

. (Galatians 6:9). In Christ Jesus you will succeed because He won for us. John 8:34-36.

                               7- CONSIDER YOUR WAYS AND CHALLENGE

                                   YOUR THINKING

“Now this is what the Lord Almighty says, ‘Consider your ways. You have planted much, but harvested little…” Haggai 1:5-6

NOTE- Do you feel that your anger is justified? On what basis? DISCUSS

What does God’s Word say about these issues and how to deal with them? RESEARCH AND EXAMINE! The Bible indicates that losing control is a work of the flesh and often indicates pride, lack of understanding, demonic influence, undisciplined behavior, and even giving out under pressure. All these can be rectified if we are willing and obedient to Christ. These topics will be addressed in more detail latter.

    WARNING AGAINST SELF JUSTIFYING

As long as we feel justified for our motives, thinking, behaviors, even if we regret or even condemn the outcome of our actions, we will never change and thus continue doing the same things with the same results. Judas, after betraying Jesus, committed suicide being grieved over the outcome of his actions instead of repenting of his sin/way and receiving God’s grace for his salvation. It is not just the action that is wrong and needs to change or be adjusted, but the very thinking and motives behind it.

STOP! – REVIEW – CONSIDER-

 As in an operation, the Word of God cuts deep “sharper than any double edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow;

it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.” Hebrews 4:12

DO YOU WISH TO PROCEED? (you can just audit the course).

Whenever our actions hurt people verbally or physically, even ourselves, it is time for repentance and change.

 

NOTE- Dear friends, God does not want to hide us from life’s trials, but rather for us to overcome them through Him.

 

NOTE – Special consideration and care must be taken where Trauma and Abuse is             involved. (Covered in HURTS Category 2)